ONE BY TWO

1.5 stars


Devika Bhagat, who's first job was that of a post-production intern for Monsoon Wedding (2001), came to light as the first & second assistant director in 2005's Tibetan language debut feature film, Dreaming Lhasa, and 2004's American-German action & spy film, The Bourne Supremacy, respectively. She then ventured out to explore the world of Indian small screen as storywriter in one of Star Channels make-believe horror show Darna Mana Hai: Season 1, Episode 4 -- Machine Age (6 November 2005). She continued her writing streak with Bollywood movies a la Manorama Six Feet Under (2007) (story & screenplay), Bachna Ae Haseeno (2008) (screenplay), Aisha (2010) ((dialogue/screenplay), Ladies vs. Ricky Bahl (screenplay) (2011), Jab Tak Hai Jaan (screenplay) (2012), I, Me aur Main (story) (2013) to the latest outing ONE BY TWO (dialogue/story and screenplay), adding one more feather to her cap with this movie -- Direction. Abhay Deol, who's predominantly considered very selective/experimentative for picking & choosing his assignments, is teaming up with his real-life girlfriend actress Preeti Desai (who made her film debut with Raj Nidimoru and DK Krishna's Shor in the City, which was released on April 2011, opposite Indian-American actor Sendhil Ramamurthy) for this light-hearted coming of age true-blue romcom, produced by Amit Kapoor, Sanjay Kapoor, Vikram Khakhar and Abhay Deol, under the banner of Viacom 18 Motion Pictures, i.e. films and Cynozure Networkz. His last solo hero film was Aisha (2010) and he's returning to true-blue romcom genre almost a decade after his debut film Socha Na Tha (2005). Now that he is also turning a producer with this flick, the film is important for Abhay to a great degree.

Amit Sharma (Abhay Deol), a man of devil-may-care attitude, has given into the mundane and has no qualms about leading a monotonous life whatsoever. He is disconcerted of the good boy tag. Adding to his woes, his girlfriend Radhika (Geetika Tyagi) dumps him on account of his uneventful life for a more successful person. On the other hand, Samara Patel (Preeti Desai), a British citizen residing in India with her separated single mother Kalpana Patel (Lillete Dubey), aspires to be a famous dancer but can't search for an opportunity apropos to displaying her skills and eventually looses her spur and confidence. They both fell short of go-getter attitude to take another step closer to their ultimate dreams. Destiny brings them together behind their back and how they manage to rediscover themselves, forms the crux of the story.

The story (Devika Bhagat) is sophisticated metropolitan yet simple. It is *not* the typical cliched Bollywood romantic tales. Here the two leads' paths cross umpteen times but they don't get to know each other face-to-face right until the climax, yet they are influenced/inspired by each other's mindsets about real life.The characters are well-etched, realists and substantial. The intricate undertone of uncertainities or the psyche of the young i.e. lack of fellow feeling, despair, growing up issues and failed career preferences, are competently woven into the narrative. The dialogues (Devika Bhagat and Manoj Tapadia) too aren't preachy and are amusingly contemporaneous, which make the agony of youth palpable. Kudos to Devika for thinking out-of-the-box and for her direction! She is aptly supported by Sameer Arya's cinematography, which captures the vivid metropolitan with virtuosity and Mustafa Stationwala's production design, which thoroughly adds lustre and catches attention of the youths promptly. Eka Lakhani's costumes and Sher Bahadur Singh's makeup/hairstyling are hodiernal.

But the execution (screenplay: Devika Bhagat) is sheer complicated. Devika packs quite a lot in the film, owing to which the movie becomes off-kilter. The pace too, is lethargic and the length (editor: Shan Mohammed) is overdrawn. The second half of the film is a complete mess. The writer loses the grip on beating around the bush with sloppy/detached sequences coming up in succession, which makes the narration boring/tedious/emotionless/flat. The film hardly moves and seems like a TV dance competition show, because of Preeti's dancing sequences (choreography: Ashley Lobo) hither and thither. The viewers will be bored to death right upto the climax. Though the lyrics, penned by poet par excellence Amitabh Bhattacharya, are synchronous, amusing and intense, the music by the eminently dexterous trio Shankar Mahadevan-Ehsaan  Noorani-Loy Mendonsa doesn't live up to the expectations. "I’m just pakaoed" (singer: Siddharth Mahadevan) is a rebellious track that represents today's pakaau zindagi but is more of a shriek and less of singing. "Kaboom" (singer: Anushka Manchanda) is a little too 'girlie' track. "Baat kya hai"'s (singer: Clinton Cerejo) introspective tune/lyrics are good enough to make listeners think but otherwise it's a sad track. "Khushfehmiyan"'s (singer: Shankar Mahadevan) heavy percussion-laden arrangement alongwith intoxicating lyrics make this one a melodic piece. The Unplugged version is dull. The retro jazz flavour of "Sheher Mera" (singer: Thomson Andrews) alongwith some lovely whistling makes this Mumbaiyaa track okeydokey. "Khuda na khaasta" (singer: Arijit Singh) is aptly supported by lovely melody and is an addictive piece. Tubby-Parik's background score is strictly okay.

The roles of Amit & Samara are tailor-made for Abhay Deol and Preeti Desai respectively. Abhay delves deep into the skin of a lax, confused guy with utmost ease and enacts his part with verve. Preeti Desai brings freshness in her character. Her dance moves are prepossessing. Her acting is neck and neck with Abhay's, consummately. She's supremely confident. This is her career best performance so far (casting director: Panchami Ghavri). Lillete Dubey, Rati Agnihotri, Jayant Kriplani, Anish Trivedi, Geetika Tyagi, Preetika Chawla, Tahir Bhasin, Yudhishtir Urs, Maya Sarao, Netrapal "He-Ra" Singh, Yashika Dhillon and Diwakar Pundir are expansive, truly. Actors of caliber Darshan Jariwala and Ragesh B. Asthana, are wasted consummately.

Before bringing this review to a close, I would like to say that Devika Bhagat's talent to have come up with such out-of-the-box story is brilliant, to say the least. Bravo! But it's the batty screenplay, that plays the spoilsport, which is far from romance, pain, joy, sorrow and sympathy but sleep. The intriguing moments are few & far between. Overall, it's a dreary effort.


first appeared on http://www.desimartini.com/reviews/somesh-sinha-one-by-two/rd24267md3260.htm#.Uut032Td_WQ.facebook

JAI HO

2.5 stars


Masala films or the *official* remake of South Indian movies in Bollywood with Salman Khan, being the lead protagonist, is selfsame. Right from Wanted (2009), Ready (2011) and Bodyguard (2011) to the latest offering "Jai Ho", which is a remake of Telugu film "Stalin" (2006) starring Chiranjeevi, which itself was inspired from an American drama film "Pay It Forward" (2000), based on the novel of the same name by Catherine Ryan Hyde, Salman Khan is ruling the roost, nay hegemonic money-spinner in current box-office scenario. After a 13 month sabbatical, the Bhai of Bollywood is here with his first strong political movie. Inasmuch as the movie is making news for all the right reasons and the ticket prices too, have not been hiked, Salman Khan is checking up his hold among the masses by focusing on what is reasonably priced to his audiences rather than running after the glossiness of box office records. Bollywood has an array of anti-corruption movies to its kitty, be it Sarfarosh (1999), Nayak (2001), Indian (2001), GangaaJal (2003) or Aan: Men at Work (2004), to name a few. There's always a man with obdurate force in all these movies, who works against the social issues and makes a big difference, ending the issues ultimately. Politic Sohail Khan's JAI HO is no exception, but in a neoteric and unique way. Adding to the glam quotient is model turned actress Daisy Shah, who's making her foray into Bollywood after a successful tenure of work in Tamil & Kannada movies. She has worked as an assistant to choreographer Ganesh Acharya for 3 years and was the female lead opposite South actor Jaggesh in the original Kannada version of Salman's 2011 superhit "Bodyguard". Also making his debut as one of the antagonists, is Santosh Shukla of Big Boss 6 fame. He was trained by Salman Khan's personal trainer Rakesh, to achieve the desired lean & stiff look.

JAI HO is a political thriller, based on the life of how an ‘Aam Aadmi’ gets crushed by trivial politicians and a common man's victorious effort to thwart an assassination bid against a Chief Minister. It is the story of honest ex-army officer Jai Agnihotri, who creates a nation-wide movement by convincing people to do a good deed for three people who must in turn each do good deeds for three other people, thus forming an ever growing circle of people helping each other. This circle of humanitarian benevolence doesn't gel with local politician (Danny Dezongpa) who in order to break the mainstay of the movement, targets Jai's mother (Nadira Babbar) and sister Geeta (Tabu). Geeta convinces Jai to compromise with the politician. But when this leads to humiliation being heaped on him, Jai loses his cool and takes fight to his enemies with his movement following him. The public, who have previously been quiescent, is gathering force, whom Jai has helped in the past and ultimately has a voice which cannot be silenced. Because Jai Ho is the resounding sound of victory...Jai Ho is the warrior cry of someone determined to win at all cost.

‘Aam Aadmi’ being the flavour of the season, the concept (A R Murugadoss) is noble, thought provoking, contemporaneous and doesn't ridicule the sentiments. The umpteen hard-hitting dialogues (Dilip Shukla) against corruption & corrupt netas, the tale of revenge and the reecho of eulogising the common man, merits prodigious applause and attention from each and every strata of the society. The message circulating throughout the movie will move the audiences consummately. Santosh Thundiyil's cinematography is awe-inspiring. The production design and art by Sabu Cyril are top-notch. Ashley Rebello and Alvira Khan Agnihotri's synchronous costumes are trendy. Sonam Chandna's makeup cum hair styling are congruous. The choreographers Remo D'Souza, Radhika Rao, Vinay Sapru, Shaikh Jani Basha and Mudassar Khan have done their job worthily. Since we have Dabangg Khan in the lead role, the *elaborated* action scenes [Anal Arasu, Ravi Varma & Dave Judge (foreign stunt coordinator)] are bone crunching, face smashing, gravity-defying and worth rounds of cheers & whistles. They are aptly choreographed/shot and are used to an adequate degree, without making the movie overburdened. The chase sequences too, are adrenaline pumping. Well-supported by Agnelo D'Souza (Special Effects Coordinator) and Prime Focus (Special Effects Studio). Salman Khan himself getting bashed, is seen after such a long...very long time.

On the flip side, the screenplay (Dilip Shukla) follows the same old formula of a Salman starrer. Dialogues-Song-Action-Dialogue-Song-Action....and no real genuineness as the movie never shifts focus from Salman Khan. Clocking in at nearly 2 hours 25 minutes, the movie's editing (Ashish Amrute) is sluggish. The music too has its ups and downs. "Baaki Sab First Class Hai" (singer: Wajid; Lyricist: Sajid, Irfan Kamal and Danish Sabri, music: Sajid-Wajid), "Tere Naina Maar Hi Daalenge" (singer: Shreya Ghoshal and Shaan; Lyricist: Sameer Anjaan; Music: Sajid-Wajid) and "Jai Ho" (singer:Armaan Malik, Brijesh Shandilya, Amal Malik , Wajid Ali; Lyricist: Shabbir Ahmed; Music: Amal Malik) are picks of the lot. "Photocopy" (singer: Himesh Reshammiya, Keerthi Sagathia and Palak Muchhal; Lyricist: Kausar Munir; Music: Sajid-Wajid), "Tumko To Aana Hi Tha" (singer: Armaan Malik, Marianne D'Cruz's and Altamash Faridi; Lyricist: Shabbir Ahmed; Music: Amal Malik), "Love You Till The End" (singer/lyricist: Armaan Malik; Music: Amal Malik) and "Naacho Re" (singer: Ujjaiyinee; Lyricist/Music: Devi Sri Prasad) are complete let-down. The predominant background score by Sandeep Shirodkar is strictly okay, reverbrating Jai ho Jai ho at every single juncture. "Nacho Re" song is there, merely to highlight Daisy's dance.

No one but Salman Khan can pull of such austere action with elan, evidently. While his strut, simplicity and generosity are beguiling, his aggression is defying. Though he follows the same trend like the last few movies that have been action-packed with the same concept of a one-man army fighting everyone, it's nearly implausible to take eyes off from him. A virtuoso performance, after a long....long time! The debutante Daisy Shah is befitting in her limited role with much earnestness. Mukul Dev alongwith Danny Denzongpa, enact their roles of corrupt, dispiteous politicians with aplomb in creating terror. Their body language emit devilry. It's a treat to watch the supremely proficient/versatile Tabu after a hiatus. Salman & Tabu's acting are neck and neck. Her monster little son (master Naman Jain) is entertaining consummately. Santosh Shukla is in supreme command, teetotally.

Mukesh Chhabra has pulled off a casting coup of sorts. From Monish Behl, Suniel Shetty, Mahesh Manjrekar, Ashmit Patel, Yash Tonk, Sana Khan, Tulip Joshi, Vikas Bhalla, Aditya Pancholi, Sharad Kapoor, Mahesh Thakur, Resham Tipnis, Haroon Qazi, Varun Badola, Vatsal Sheth, Nauheed Cyrusi, Bruna Abdulla to Genelia Deshmukh and Sudesh Lehri, are those closest pals of Salman Khan who’ve either performed their Bollywood stint or whose career never took off indeed, giving them each a part that proves Salman’s colossal munificence. They have done a commendable job though.

To sum up, JAI HO will scale dizzy heights due to its fascinating emotional drama, entwined with romance & songs, and specifically, action and a genuine strong message, which relates very well with the present scenario. Alike every single bland Salman starrer, this movie too doesn't merit a review because Sohail Khan solely relies on the messiah of box-office and Salman competently shoulders the responsibility. The movie flaunts Salman's 'Being Human' demeanour and less about a movie. Take the message/action out of it and the result will be exasperating. The daunting move to release it in a non-festive, non-holiday season won't backfire. An absolute must for Salman Khan loyalists, who will hoot and applaud to the fullest! Dedicated cinephiles stay away, explicitly!

first appeared on http://www.desimartini.com/reviews/somesh-sinha-jai-ho/rd24142md2855.htm#.UuIo8ZX7hOM.facebook

KARLE PYAAR KARLE

1/2 star

Suneel Darshan -- the man who erst ruled the roost as director/producer of hit musicals like Jaanwar (1999), Ek Rishtaa: The Bond of Love (2001), Andaaz (2003), Dosti: Friends Forever (2005) and Barsaat: A Sublime Love Story (2005), to name a few, under the banner of Shree Krishna International, is back from a seven year sabbatical, rendering launchpad to his six feet tall son Shiv Darshan into Bollywood, who has studied acting in New York Film Academy and even pursued dancing in Broadway Dance Centre. Nay, the actioner romcom KARLE PYAAR KARLE has newbie Hasleen Kaur, the Femina Miss India Earth 2011 making his foray into the silver screen. The movie is helmed by debutant Director Rajesh Pandey, who was the Associate Director of Mr. Darshan's Barsaat: A Sublime Love Story (supra). Additionally, he was even the Production Manager & one of the supporting actors of Mission Kashmir (2000) and the Production Controller of Eklavya (2007).

KARLE PYAAR KARLE is an adrenaline gushing, action packed, edgy love story of two rebels, Kabir & Preet, playing the game of life. The unstable environment within their homes manifests into their daring attitude towards life. Right from their childhood Kabir and Preet indulged in playing borderline dangerous games trying to defy the fear and complexes within. In a desperate moment, eight year old Kabir indulged in an act that lead him to the doors of a juvenile home. In a bid to protect Kabir, his mother decided to leave town to escape the harsh punishment. After travelling from one city to another for 12 years, the family returns to their home town where Kabir and Preet reconnect......beginning a mad chapter of dares, games and fun. The film is a journey of their unbridled games as they discover themselves and the essence of romance. Problems rear up as though it was their destiny. Preet started believing that they are ill fated and it's best they should stay away. Kabir firmly believed that only if they are together, will they survive. Preet willingly tore herself apart from Kabir leading them to a point of no return. They love to dare........ But will they dare to love?

Suneel Darshan has had an assiduousness of writing and has penned the story of this movie too. Rakesh Pandey, Reshu Nath and Rahul Patel's screenplay/dialogues, fitted with the main plot, are laced with expletives high and low, full of obscenity (females are shown in the minimal/skimpy of costumes) & smooches, have nil novel/fetching/affectionate (for a love story to be) and apart from that, nix. One wonders for a prudent writer a la Mr. Darshan to have come up with such odious plot, that too after a sabbatical to launch his son. The movie has been shot extensively and avowedly at Lavasa, Pune, Delhi, Dubai, Mumbai and Thailand with a budget of INR 180,000,000 (estimated). The thriftlessness could be seen manifestly. Navneet Misser's cinematography captures the pictorial locales nimbly. Devendra Murdeshwar's editing is tardy. Clocking in at roughly 2 hours, it's fatiguing consummately. Manish Binani's art is gawky. In lieu of creating a raw sort of action, only because of chiselled body of the male lead, Baan Rig and Mehmood Bakshi have come up with mawky/South-esque stunts. The direction is even more puerile, with the storyline going haywire.

The movie has also given budding musicians a chance to prove their mettles. But none of the five musicians, namely Rayyan Ameen, Rashid Khan, Prashant Singh, Mumzy Stranger, Meet Brothers Anjjan have come up with even a single hummable/catchy/indelible or chatbusting track. Suneel Darshan has also directed music for the film. But all the seven tracks, videlicet, Karle Pyaar Karle, Teri Saason Mein, O Darling, Mutasir, Tanhaai, Kurbaan and Soni Soni Akkha Nu give the impression of being outmoded. The lyrics by Rashid Khan, Shakeel Azmi, Kumaar, Suneel Darshan, Yusuf Khan, Mumzy, Paras Chaurasia, Mehmood Arfat and Tasha Tah give the feeling of deja vu and are hackneyed, except for the lyrics of "Mutasir", which probably is the best song in the album and the lyrics too, are novel. The choreographers Rakesh Sharma and Ranju Verghese have done a competent job in choreographing astir dance sequences, targeting the youth audience. The background score is a sore to the ear.

The fresh bunch of actors have categorically been taken for granted. Be it the debutant Shiv Darshan, who is so high and mighty thoroughly, thanks to the director Rajesh Pandey or the debutante Hasleen Kaur, who though is photogenic & in high spirits, but both the leads should have performed as side actors first, then they would have been working as main leads. Aham Sharma, Ankit Raaj, Sanjay Sharma, Mahesh Thakur, Karan Anand, Amandeep Kaur, Meneka Kurup Arora, Nilanjana Gupta, Aru Verma, Roshan Preet, Aditi Khanna, Shailesh Hejmady, Dennis Fernandes, Shaji Chaudhary, Suyash Shukla, Yash Acharya, Dhwani Gori, Dimppy Sabherwal and Rumy Khan have blown up their respective roles.

To sum it up, this one's a pejorative damp squib from such a putative production house. An out and out/staunch let-down in terms of acting, direction, songs, dialogues and other technicalities. Stay clear, period!

first appeared on http://www.desimartini.com/movies/karle-pyaar-karle/md3254.htm

YAARIYAN

1 star


Divya Khosla Kumar -- the wife of the head honcho of Super Cassettes Industries Limited aka T-Series, Bhushan Kumar, who's also a top dog among Hindi film producers -- started her career in Bollywood as an actor in Ab Tumhare Hawale Watan Saathiyo (2004). Divya then did a course in cinematography and editing. Post that, Divya directed music videos for Agam Nigam, Jermaine Jackson, Tulsi Kumar etc., and even helmed a few ad films. After directing 20 music videos, she is debuting as director cum story & screenplay writer for this college romance movie. And in lieu of opting for the big shots of Bollywood, she chose to cast rank newcomers in lead roles, which albeit, was the demand of the script.

YAARIYAN is a contemporary young film that takes audiences through the trials and tribulations of the best years of their life. Set in a boarding school of Sikkim, YAARIYAN is a story of close knit 5 friends who are exploring the best moments of their lives in college, experiencing different relationships and learning new values every day.  YAARIYAN is about different characters, their bonding, their friendship, their problems, their fun, their mistakes, their relations. It is about their YAARIYAN during good and bad, thick and thin. The college Principal Jim Martin (Gulshan Grover) summons these five students and handles them the responsibility to save their college campus from an Australian hotelier, who intends making a resort and casino. In order to save the college, these students must surpass their Australian peers, in the test of physical and mental abilities through the medium of chess, cycling, rock concert and rock-climbing, as well. How their Yaariyan triumphs, after igniting the missing patriotism in the male lead, forms the crux of the story.

The story/screenplay (Divya Khosla Kumar and Sanjeev Dutta) is a dreary amalgamation of KJo's Student of The Year (2012) and Indra Kumar's first-of-its-kind superhit adult comedy Grand Masti (2013). Read this, the male lead is worthless and his only motive is to share his passionate first kiss with a girl. The initial half an hour of the movie is totally devoted to his kissing escapades, with tacky, dual meaning dialogues (Sanjeev Dutta) forming the banter and a song coming out of nowhere, in between. Though the songs are the sole saving grace of the movie (music directors: Pritam Chakraborty, Mithoon, Yo Yo Honey Singh, Arko Pravo Mukherjee and Anupam Amod), the plotline is incapacitated, imbecile and extremely dumb. Being a woman director herself, Divya has no inhibitions/qualms in portraying girls as the only means of fulfilling the sexual urge of male. Every single lady/girl in the movie is shown flaunting her assets. Yes, the cinematography (Sameer Arya) is top-notch, which gives the feel of a lavish Bollywood affair. The DoP swathes the viewers by capturing the lush locales of Sikkim & Australia with finesse. Aarif Sheikh's editing is an utter doom, with the movie clocking in at 145 minutes. The pace dips & goes up hand in hand. Had it not been his wife, I'm assured that Bhushan Kumar won't present the movie under his banner.

Himansh Kohli.... Lakshya, Serah Singh.... Jenny, Nicole Faria.... Jiya, Dev Sharma.... Neil, Rakul Preet.... Saloni, Evelyn Sharma.... Jannet, Shreyas Pardiwalla.... Pardy, Sayali Bhagat, Deepti Naval, Gulshan Grover, Smita Jaykar, Yo Yo Honey Singh and Vikas Verma are all wasted. The makers have taken them for granted. One wonders, what made such actors of calibre sign the movie as Gulshan, Deepti & Smita Jaykar.

On the whole, the movie is a messy hodge-podge of lust, girls, songs and more girls, without any story or so. Had it not been the fear of Censor Board of Film Certification, the makers would have surpassed even Grand Masti, in terms of vulgarity/crudity. Shame on Divya Khosla Kumar! Neither her direction nor her choreography (she had choreographed five songs) have the potential to offer something out-of-the-box and that too with supreme proud & confidence. Direction/Story cum screenplay writing is not your cup of tea Mrs. Kumar. A ham-fisted affair!

First appeared on http://www.desimartini.com/movies/yaariyan/md3212.htm

DEDH ISHQIYA

4 stars

Abhishek Chaubey undertook his career as an associate director and co-writer with famed film director, Vishal Bhardwaj. He, in particular, went on to assist & co-write Vishal's ensuing films. He afterwards, adduced a bucolic zany ride titled ISHQIYA (2010), which was set in the hinterland, and the audiences overcarried the risque comedy cum suspenseful noir due to its enthralling screenplay and uncompromised direction. The immensely entrancing predecessor preludes to the majestic sequel, DEDH ISHQIYA, which continues the escapades of Khalujaan (Naseeruddin Shah)and Babban (Arshad Warsi), the two romantic thieves. This time love takes them through the seven stages of love... with the beautiful and dangerous Madhuri Dixit as Begum Para and Huma Qureshi as Muniya. While the former was a love triangle, the latter entwines disparate worlds of two love stories, running cheek by jowl. Dedh Ishqiya is no different from its prequel, when it comes to the complexity, which is notch ahead this time, with impulsive characters, a storyline taking a somersault every few minutes and the truth, which is verily shocking. This time around, there's a profusion of poetry, music and hues to prettify the narration (screenplay: Vishal Bhardwaj and Abhishek Chaubey), embellished with chaste Urdu, vivid mellifluence (production design: Subrata Chakraborthy and Amit Ray), unostentatious humor and seething sexuality. The layered story (storywriter: Darab Farooqui) will bemuse the audiences, in the interim. The characters are more perfidious and the traitorous game's even more precarious.

Taking on from where we left off, Dedh Ishqiya discovers yet another escapade of Khalujan (Naseeruddin Shah) and Babban (Arshad Warsi), a poetic journey underlined with revenge, drama and deception. The Begum (Madhuri Dixit-Nene) of Mahmudabad is hosting a festival of poetry and music in her mansion. The country’s best poets are in town. Khalujan posing as the Nawaab of Chandpur, is participating as a poet in the festival. He is not there merely to show off his poetic wares but to impress the widowed Begum who, as the grapevine suggests, is scouting for a husband -preferably a poet.Babban (Arshad Warsi) arrives in Mahmudabad to take Khalujan back to their old life but his plans change the moment he sets his eyes on Begum’s maid and confidant, Munira alias Muniya (Huma Qureshi), a brash and sexy young woman.Muniya too has plans of her own. She leaves the palace every now and then in a disguise to meet gangsters in dark alleys. The palace is rife with intrigue. The shayari is dropped for the guns, daring chases and hidden intentions. In the end, love triumphs even if the players of the story do not.

Vishal Bhardwaj, the dialogue writer and the DoP Satyajit Pande deserve pats on their backs, for acidic witty and subtly impish dialogues, discreetly mixed with Urdu and for the stunning visuals of the old-world charm captured stupendously, respectively. Ditto for A. Sreekar Prasad, the editor. Clocking in at nearly 2 hours 30 minutes, the movie neither topples nor leaves any loopholes at all, while constructing sequences with unflagging resolve. Payal Saluja's costumes are in sync with stately mood of the film, teetotally. Remo D'Souza and Birju Maharaj's choreography is seemingly rorty. As the emphasis is on poetry this time, the background score by Clinton Cerejo is electrifying. Honey Trehan, the casting director has done the unthinkable by doing a namable job in bringing together such dexterous bunch of actors. Naseeruddin Shah is the soul of the film, cognizably. He pulls off his role to near perfection. The viewers could not simply take their eyes off from him, every time he comes in the frame. Dr Bashir Badr's untamed & glinted verses have been used in the movie, which are gems indeed. Arshad Warsi is a live wire and a powerhouse of talent evidently, infusing his indomitable vivacity into the film with his role. The repeated banter between Khalu and Babban are a delight to watch from commencement to conclusion. Huma Qureshi's acting would take the audiences' fancy with utter surprise. What a scorcher she is! High hopes are being pinned on Madhuri Dixit-Nene, who's returning to the silver screen after a hiatus of 6 years. She is an unmitigated magic, no two doubts in that. Though she falls short on the oomph meter, as compared to Vidya Balan in Ishqiya, but this time, her lucent smile conjures, her dance infatuates and her puckish glance bewitches the viewers. Her choice of opting for an unostentatious, avant-garde character is sure to win laurels in times to come. Vijay Raaz is transcendent, as ever. His acting will be lauded, much after the conclusion of the film. Salman Shahid (in a cameo) as the whimsical gang lord and Ravi Gosain are first-rate. Manoj Pahwa as the poet in immurement, who never pans out flaunting his Italian origins, is top-notch.

On the flip side, the music by Vishal Bhardwaj fizzles out, as compared to the predecessor. The movie lacks even a single entrancing score. The stunts by Pradyuman Kumar are inoperable.

On the whole, director Abhishek Chaubey takes a leap by picking up the baton and deserves colossal praise for handling action, comedy, romance and social critique with dexterity. The astuteness, jibe, silliness and sophistication, all brought together are a treat to watch. The viewers will love themselves losing from dilkashi to junoon. A deliciously nouvelle continuation, that is strictly *not-to-be-missed*!

First appeared on http://www.desimartini.com/

MR JOE B. CARVALHO

1 star

Fridays are becoming a messy hodgepodge in Bollywood with each transient months/years, in the matter of getting an epochal release. On the contrary, releasing a fim on the very first Friday of the New Year is pervasively considered to be jinxed. The directors/producers do vouch for the same. And when there are myriad of Bollywood films churning out every single Friday, they are now being left barehanded other than to explore the date. 18 years heretofore, Amitabh Bachchan's production company had launched Arshad Warsi with "Tere Mere Sapne". At the moment, the two are grappling with each other in the most abstemious manner as the re-release of "Sholay" in the 3D version has "Mr. Joe B. Carvalho" running in theatres concomitantly. The movie was shot in all of 58 days in Goa, Bengaluru, Mumbai and Coorg.

Mr. Joe B. Carvalho is a mad-cap detective caper of a bumbling detective a la Inspector Jacques Clouseau of The Pink Panther fame, who becomes the catch of fallacious identity. General Kopa Bhalerao Kabana (Snehal Dhabi), who is a ruler of a small island in Africa, has managed to ensnare an attractive young woman, Gehna Naidu (Geeta Basra), daughter of a liquor baron from Bengaluru. Problem is that Gehna rejects him the minute they come face to face realising that he looks like the back of a truck. After dumping Kopa, Gehna quickly hitches up with Lohesh Garodia, son of a prominent diamond merchant, Kamlesh Garodia. Hell hath no fury like a General scorned and so Kopa kabana decides that come what may, this wedding will not happen. MK, top don and electronics dealer from India, is leading contender for the job of Wedding-Destroyer Number 1 but loses out to the kaatil of international repute, the dangerous, ominous and mysterious master-of-disguise Carlos aka Big C (Javed Jaffrey). Confident kaatil Carlos flies down to India and now has a mission to accomplish, a jealous don MK to watch out for, and an unexpected element who will change the game altogether - the protagonist, the naive, inept, simple-minded private eye, Joe B Carvalho, when read in Hindi expounds to “you can make me do anything”, played by Arshad Warsi, who has only recently graduated to ‘complicated’ cases from finding the cable TV-stealing neighbours to looking for a young woman Neena Khurana (Karishma Kotak), who elopes with chef Ramlaal. His search takes him to the hotel room of Carlos, a vicious villain with a personality disorder, played by Jaaved Jaffrey. MK (Vijay Raaz) and goons (who don't know what the master-of-disguise Carlos really looks like), who are also out to get Carlos, believe Joe is Carlos. Here Joe also comes face to face with an ex-flame, Inspector Shantipriya Phadnis (Soha Ali Khan), the cop assigned to tackle the Carlos case. She starts to believe that the man she used to love has turned into a brute antar-rashtriya khooni. Carlos is so dangerous that no one can survive him. There’s a running gag in the film that whoever says his name, dies. He’s so much bad luck that it’s bad luck seven times over. After a lot of hesitation, she swears she will nab Joe and doesn't matter if she has to weave a web of love and deceit around him.

The story/screenplay by Mahesh Ramchandani can be regarded as straight-faced comedy with simple, corny & indeterminate plot. Samir Tewari, who makes his directorial debut with the movie performs his job with utmost sincerity and total belief in the script. Anshumaan Singh Thakur, the additional cameraman, too has lent able support. Parag Chadha has done a remarkable job in casting such a talented bunch of actors. Ravi Verma's stunts have more of Southern flavour to them with goons flying even with a simple punch offered by both the leads and are funny. In case of costumes, Tanya Pal has avowedly done a sagacious job in styling up the characters as per their roles. Soha Ali Khan has donned a khakee uniform, apsara outfit, cabaret costume, bikini and even a towel as well, for the first time on-screen.  Before he became an actor, Arshad Warsi was a choreographer -- and he returns to choreographing after a hiatus of 20 years with Mind Blastic song. Rest of the songs are choreographed funnily by Chinni Prakash. There's this particular scene, where Vijay Raaz follows Arshad & Soha in the later part of the second half, is a laughathon.

On the flip side, the jokes fall flat at numerous occasion. The situations/characters try hard to chuckle you, but fail miserably. Aseem Bajaj's cinematography vacuous. There's nothing in the film which has got an iota of intelligence. The substandard visual effects by Just Right Studioz are absolute letdown. Dharmendra Sharma's editing causes one to extemporaneously nap. Adding to the misery, a song pops out of nowhere. Amartya Rahut, a relatively inexperienced music composer (as far as the Hindi film industry is concerned), has tried to take his chance by the horns. ''Chumma Chaati'' (Singer: Shefali Alvaris, Amartya Rahut & Pinky Maidsani; Lyricist: Amitabh Bhattacharya) is amusingly unconventional, idiosyncratic & comic situational party track. ''Mind Blastic'' (Singer: Neeraj Shridhar; Lyricist: Puneet Sharma) introduces the lead protagonist Arshad Warsi & is a narcissist oft-heard track. ''Ring Ring'' (singer: Subhajit Mukerjee; lyricist: Virag Mishra) is based more on the basis of famous nursery rhyme Ringa Ringa Roses and the lyrics are lucid. The situational ''Ae Ji Suniye'' (singer: Hamsika Iyer & Amartya Rahut; Lyricist: Virag Mishra) is a humorous cum inconsequential track. Javed Jaffrey sings and writes the lyrics for "Carlos", which is wacky, nonsensical and an introduction track to his many-faced character. Overall, the music is an absolute letdown. The production value is tacky. Vardhraj Kamath's art is uninhabited. Ditto for the background score.

Arshad Warsi is an incredible actor, virtually. He slips into the role with utmost ease & such finesse. In a comedy movie like this, the pain is keeping a straight face and ignoring the stupidity one is doing and Arshad has done this with unblemished faith and conviction. Soha Ali Khan learnt martial arts and cartwheel for the tailor-made role. She's ever done intense or girl-next-door stuffs & this time round, she's got out of this stereotype. Right from fighting, dancing, doing comedy to running after the bad guys, she's doing everything in the film, which traditionally a hero does. She's consummately brilliant. Jaaved Jaaferi is there as an African guy, a sadhu, a blonde as well as a Maharashtrian woman. He dons the different quirky avatars every time he comes onscreen. He has the inherent talent of impeccable comic timing. Yet he emits villainy with hubris. He is phenomenal throughout. Kunal Khemu has a cameo. Salman Khan is the *invisible* hero. Babul Supriyo, Geeta Basra, Himani Shivpuri, Navni Prahar, Manoj Joshi, Rajesh Balwani, Ranjeet, Shakti Kapoor, Snehal Dhabi, Veerendra Saxena, Vijay Raaz and Vrajesh Hirjee are wasted teetotally in their respective roles. Zeke and Zene Warsi are following their father's footsteps.

To sum up, it is a brainless story of brainless characters, which has some genuine funny moments, but they are few & far between. One of the taglines to the movie is ‘Leave your brain at home' because the makers too, have left their brains while filming. The movie is made for the dummies, by the dummies. A colossal disappointment!

SHOLAY 3D

Sholay -- the name in the world of Hindi cinema, justify the honorific status 'Indisputable Classic' to the full extent. An action-adventure, the film follows two criminals, Veeru and Jai (played by Dharmendra and Amitabh Bachchan), hired by a retired police officer (Sanjeev Kumar) to capture the ruthless dacoit Gabbar Singh (Amjad Khan). Hema Malini and Jaya Bhaduri played Veeru and Jai's love interests. The film was shot in the rocky terrain of Ramanagara, in the southern state of Karnataka, over a span of two and a half years. When first released, Sholay received negative critical reviews and a tepid commercial response, but favourable word-of-mouth publicity helped it to become a box office success. It broke records for continuous showings in many theatres across India, and ran for more than five years at Mumbai's Minerva theatre, besides celebrating Golden Jubilee and Silver Jubilee in several cities and towns then. By some accounts, Sholay is the highest grossing Indian film of all time, adjusted for inflation. The film drew heavily from the conventions of Westerns, and is a defining example of the masala genre. The film's dialogues and certain characters became extremely popular, contributing to numerous cultural memes and becoming part of India's daily vernacular. R. D. Burman composed the film's psychedelic & inimitable music, and the lyrics were written by Anand Bakshi. The movie was a trailblazer in terms of camera work as well as music and practically every scene, dialogue or even a small character was a highlight.

Directed by one of the finest raconteurs of India (Ramesh Sippy), one of the most powwowed and extolled movies ever, now unveils in a new avatar -- 3D. 38 years after, off-the-shelf dialogues -- memorable all; such as  'Holi kab hai, kab hai Holi?' 'Bahut yaarana lagta hai', 'Kitne aadmi the..', 'Yeh haath mujhe de de thakur', 'Jo dar gaya, samjho mar gaya', 'Yeh dushmani bahut mehengi padegi Thakur, bahut mehengi', 'Chal Dhanno', 'Basanti, in kutton ke saamne mat naachna', 'Jao, jaake kehdo Gabbar se, Ramgarh-walo ne paagal kutton ke saamne roti daalna bandh kar diya hain', 'Yeh haath nahin, phaansi ka phanda hain, Gabbar' are set to stir up audiences and make them reminiscent & nostalgic as well. Filmmaker Ketan Mehta's company Maya Digital was responsible for converting the film into 3D format, after being approached by the late producer G. P. Sippy's grandson, Sasha Sippy in 2010. Shezaad Sippy and cousin Shaan Uttamsingh are co-producers. It took INR 25 crore to convert Sholay into 3D format. Under the leadership of computer animator Frank Foster, 350 people worked to convert the film into digital 3D format for which each and every scene had to be individually restored, colour-corrected and re-composited in 3D to match the depth. New set-pieces which lend themselves to the visual experience, particularly in the said format were also included, like digital logs which scatter in the direction of the camera during the first half of the film with the trains collision with them, the gunshot scene which frees Jai and Veeru from their handcuff along with the panoramic views of Gabbar's hideout in the caves. This is the longest movie to be made in 3D, with 207 minutes of runtime. Jayantilal Gada, Chairman of Pen India Pvt Ltd, is presenter and distributor of the movie.

Reviewing such a gargantuan movie ever made, is neither fair nor are we dexterous enough to criticize it. The 3D avatar is crystal-clear and crisp, as per today's time. The colors and sharpness are lustrous and serene, especially in the close-up scenes of the actors, where they look par excellence. The contribution by director of photography (Dwarka Divecha) is simply precious. The layered 3D effects are limited to action scenes like the train sequence, the holi fight and Amitabh Bachchan's penultimate fight scene, which would be loved by the youngsters. And those who may have lost count of the number of times they've watched this incredible entertainer, these scenes with 3D effects would work as icing on the cake. On the flip side, the digitalisation of music by Raju Singh tends to give in the voices of original singers, at times. Rest assured, the background score is top notch. We are fortunate enough to witness such a grand event back on big screen, in times when there is no prominent market for old classic releases. The cineastes are blest by watching this cult movie at the commencement of 2014. Many of us wasn't not born when the Indian cinema got its most iconic movie. But don't miss the chance now to feel the epic friendship between Jai and Veeru, Basanti-Dhanno duo and the Indian cinema’s greatest villain Gabbar Singh. The epic shouldn't merely be rated on five stars. Book your tickets pronto and get awestruck by yesteryears' prolific writers Salim-Javed's chef d'oeuvre.